2013 to 2014.

So I know I'm (very) late in posting this, but the past few months have been very different from any other in the past, and for a variety of reasons I haven't really been able to stop and reflect on 2013 and plan for 2014. The biggest of these reasons: I'm pregnant! And while it has been an absolute JOY and such a blast so far, I've truly been engulfed in a fog of first trimester fatigue and zombie-dom since early December. Add that fatigue that Logan graduated, started a new job, and we MOVED... Well, January just slipped right through my sleepy little fingers.

SO. In reflecting on 2013, I have so many thoughts. We had the highest highs and the lowest lows in 2013. We had a pretty average year for the first half. Besides Lemon Tree growing like crazy, everything else was pretty peachy and normal. Then, August. I found out I was pregnant (round one, due April 9th) the day after I got home from Amber Housley Inspired (a conference I attended for Lemon Tree). Long story short, we miscarried about three weeks later so needless to say, we were on quite a rollercoaster in the month of August. The pregnancy was a HUGE surprise and I think intuitively I knew something wasn't right... so we were never really able to enjoy those three weeks. After that, it sort of felt like our world fell apart for awhile. Logan and I were stronger and closer than ever - we grew in ways we never knew we could - but suddenly everything in my life just felt.... empty. Fast forward a few months of mourning and healing, and we decided that our hearts were changed from the experience and we were left wanting to start a family. We decided we'd wait until after Paris so we could enjoy that trip and not worry about morning sickness or miscarriages, and that's exactly what we did. A few weeks after we got home it was the week of Logan's graduation (and the first full week at his new job), and bam. Positive pregnancy test! It. Was. AWESOME.

Everything else seemed to fall right into place. We'd been looking at a house in Donelson, and we finally were able to close and move right after Christmas (the same day of the pregnancy that I miscarried with my first... thank goodness I was distracted!). It was a CRAZY (and I mean C-R-A-Z-Y) few weeks for us between the pregnancy, the job, moving... But so wonderful and sweet and exhausting all at once. We learned a multitude of lessons in 2013, and most importantly we learned how to weather a storm together and lean on each other and look to God for guidance in those darkest moments. As painful as it was, I'm so thankful for how we grew through that experience. And now look where God has lead us!

We're due August 20th (yay!), so that obviously plays into a lot of our plans for 2014.

For Lemon Tree, honestly, I'm dying to do so many things with the business. It's been neglected since August last year just because of everything going on in our lives... but this probably won't be the year I really get to really pour myself into it. I keep reminding myself that my story is different from everyone else's and while I take so much joy and pride in friends of mine who's businesses are going gang busters - I won't allow myself to be unhappy that I can't do that right now. I have a baby in my belly! That's my first priority, and Lemon Tree will just have to wait a little bit to get the attention I truly want to give it. So we'll see. For now, I'm just hoping to maintain what I have currently and possibly add a couple of products IF I have the time and energy. I'm purposefully setting my expectations low for this year so I won't be discouraged... I hope I can over deliver! :) I know it seems backwards to spend the pregnancy focusing on the baby and hope to focus on the business once the baby's born, but trust me... for a lot of reasons this makes the most sense for us. (Yes, I know, having a baby is not easy and I will be busier than ever and what am I thinking. Just please, go with me on this. 2015 will be a Lemon Tree year with a little one as my new assistant!)

Lipscomb is just wonderful. We're still figuring out what maternity leave/our plan looks like for our future, but right now I am soaking up every moment in that wonderful office full of friends. I feel so lucky to get to work with people I love and enjoy being around. I look forward to going to work in the morning - and that's something I never want to take for granted.

On a personal level, our goal of buying a house has finally been reached (how did that happen?!), so I really just want us to focus this year on strengthening our marriage and preparing an unshakeable foundation for our baby. I don't want our child to become the center of our marriage, so Logan and I are brainstorming ways we can intentionally focus on each other and support each other as we transition into parenting. I'm going to be someone's MOM. That. Is. CRAZY!!!

Overall, I hope that 2014 holds more growth and hopefully an uneventful year beyond the birth of our firstborn. With the storms of last year, I'm looking forward to hopefully just hunkering down and spending time together this year as a family of three (Gracie included!) and later a family of four. But we'll see. I guess only God knows what lies ahead, but I know in all things He does a much better job of planning than I do! :) In the meantime, I am LOVING growing this little baby and taking it all one day at a time. I already can't believe that we're already public... I know I'll have a baby in my arms before I know it, and I don't want to wish one moment away. :)

My apologies for the lack decent writing in this post... I'm desperate to start blogging more (just for myself) and I'm taking the pressure off of myself to blog for anyone other than me. It's therapeutic to put your thoughts into words, so I'm leaning into that and leaving the fluff behind.

Thanks for reading. Here's to 2014! :)